Last year’s recession hit the freelance RPG pretty hard. So much so that it made it more difficult for budding RPG bloggers to get published outside of their online havens. On more than one occasion I’ve shared my desire to become a freelance writer and I sent several pitches to different publishers.
As things stand today, I have written a level 5 D&D 4e adventure to be published, hopefully, sometime over the summer and I also have an article in the last issue of Kobold Quarterly.
Those who’ve followed me for some time know that I sent some very promising pitches to Wizards of the Coast for D&D adventures. I even went as far as writing a detailed outline for an adventure, named “Where’s Francis”, aimed at pre-teen children. It was a follow-up on the fate of Francis the Badger from the now legendary D&D advertisement video.
(The outline is really, really awesome, I’ll publish it soon).
Alas, for various reasons related to staff shortage and editorial choices, none of my pitches were retained past the detailed outline stage. As always is the case with rejection, some disappointment set in and I started the circle of self doubting again .
That is, until I talked about it to my friend Luke at Pax last weekend.
Yeah, that one.
Luke: You know what Phil? Fuck them! You can write for yourself now, even in that droning English-frog style your fans inexplicably love.
Chatty: Ha! Screw you too. Yeah, heaven knows I have the established brand and reputation for that.
Luke: You totally do, more than those yet-unfired schmucks working on dumbing down 4e and ripping off old campaign settings.
(Yes Luke talks about, and sometimes even plays D&D)
Chatty: Hmm… I’ve been thinking about it, I just can’t bring myself to take that first step.
Luke: Oh fuck you Phil, stop being such a pussy! You know you can do it. Hell, would you consider doing it with me?
Chatty: Bwa? Like doing a kids’ RPG using Mouse Guard?
Luke: It could be something like that, it doesn’t have to be MG. Kids like crunchy crap with tons of numbers like Pokemon and all those card games with numbers in the gazillions.
Chatty: Hell man, my 8 year old son loves WoW minis and Dominion and didn’t we both grow up with AD&D?
Luke: Exactly my point, the design could be even more crunchy than 4e. All kinds of stuff kids love doing. Can you imagine the shit that this would stir in the community? I can feel the trolls lining up to take potshots already, it would be beautiful.
Chatty: (Getting excited) Are you shitting me man? This would be so cool to put in everyone’s face just how brights kids are.
Luke: I shit you not. Kids are great roleplayers and brighter than the last generation in terms of processing info. It’s a great design challenge for a dumbass newbie like you.
Chatty: Yeah yeah, fuck you too. Oh man! Imagine, we could expend on the Character Burner and adapt BW’s magic rules to push the existing MG rule set into a full fantasy game, but…
Luke: Hmm?
Chatty: I’d worry about how kids would react to social mechanics that force outcomes…
Luke (Waving me away in his very New York style): Oh come on man, draw the damn plans before buying the paint. We can get to those later… just think about it.
Chatty: Dude… that would be, like , 55 shades of awesome. Thanks for the offer, you rule.
Luke: Yeah… I get that a lot…
So there you have it. I’m going full-spectral gaming in terms of design too! We still have to work out many details and nothing is set in stone, but the project and the idea has been launched. For the moment, I just need to find a cool Burning Wheel-like name for the game.
Got any suggestions? I am so excited about this!
John R says
First bit of advice: dude, tone down the language, you’re a children’s RPG author ferchrissake!
greywulf says
Burning Badgers?
Or is that illegal in Canada?
.-= greywulf´s last blog ..DAZ3d Freebie of the week: Fantasy Firearms =-.
ChattyDM says
@John: I was relating the discussion as it happened with the emotional elements that came with them. But thanks for pointing the dichotomy out :). And Luke is a dick like that, at least we all are after 3 days of convention. 🙂
@Greywulf: As long as you don’t call it Burning Beavers, we don’t break any federal laws.
TheMainEvent says
Maybe a Freezing Tundra RPG in honor of Canada?
Scalding Bacon?
Arkhein says
I am not familiar with ‘cool Burning Wheel-like’ names, but I did think of a name with ‘burn’ in it . . .
It Burns When I Pee
The game mechanic, however, would probably not be appropriate for children. 🙂
-Ark
ChattyDM says
As long as we’re slightly off thread, how about Burning Swine: The Indie Canadian Bacon RPG?
You guys are hilarious. 😀
DeadGod says
Is it just me, or did that conversation sound like it could have been written by Quentin Tarantino?
Man, if Tarantino did a pulp-action movie about Luke and Chatty making a game, I think my head would explode.
.-= DeadGod´s last blog ..Game Mechanics for Personality (for any edition of D&D) =-.
ChattyDM says
@Deadgod: Ha! Talking about RPGs is serious shit man. You would not believe how animated my discussions with Luke can become. But I will take this comment as praise of the highest order. (Bows)
.-= ChattyDM´s last blog ..Lost Badgers and Kid Guards =-.
Eric Maziade says
If all your friends keep pushing you, you’ll end up taking the self-publicating plunge, won’t you?
(Sure hope so)
*shove*
I didn’t recover all my creative energies yet (as you noticed yesterday night)… but let me indulge myself an pitch silly names…
Inflamed Rotary Implement
Heavy Crunch
Stop, Drop and Roll
That Game With the Dice
Improved Shower
Operational Monster
Freakin’ Cool
Now, I’ll take a nap.
.-= Eric Maziade´s last blog ..PSN Store lacking features =-.
Raevhen says
“Badgers? We don’t need no stinking Badgers!”
~Rae
ChattyDM says
“Ya know? For a 200 gp potion of healing, it’s a motherfucking good potion of healing”
Andy says
“Rocks Fall, Everyone Burns” (RFEB). Do yourself one step better, and make it Advanced RFEB, ARFEB.
.-= Andy´s last blog ..Dice Profiles: d6 =-.
Judd says
If you want to design a burning game, you totally should but I think Luke was offering to help with any kind of game, not just a BW or MG hack. Design the game you want and love because when you are at your most difficult point, no matter how cool the game is, you are going to effing hate the game.
.-= Judd´s last blog ..Tycho speaks. =-.
ChattyDM says
Thanks for everyone chiming in. I see that my regulars caught on the Hoax (which I think was very clever). I don’t plan to do a kids RPG with Luke Crane… although I’m sure he’d be more than happy to give me pointers and laugh at my froggy accent (as he calls it) while he does so. I do plan to publish it through whatever best channel I can find.
Some were really caught off guard, either by the language (the irony of using such language to talk about a children RPG escaped me, making this post even more awesome to my eyes. For this I apologized, I flirted with a secondary April fool’s in that I would act like a complete jerk all day… but that would have likely been a Bad Move (TM).
Others were really suprised (or delighted) by me deciding to go with BW for a children’s engine. Hell I even got 2 “don’t use BW, come and do it with us/them” responses over IM and email today…
Regardless, the outline I submitted remains an absolutely awesome (and timeless) idea that I will publish…
One more month peeps, the spring seminar season will be over.
.-= ChattyDM´s last blog ..Lost Badgers and Kid Guards =-.
Chris Sims says
I was fooled, and I emailed. =)
ChattyDM says
Yeah, after I stopped felling bad, that made my freaking day!
🙂
.-= ChattyDM´s last blog ..Lost Badgers and Kid Guards =-.
DavidC says
I totally didn’t realize it was an April Fool’s joke because it was a truly great idea. Now I’m actually disappointed.
I especially love all your family gaming posts because they’ve given me some great ideas and direction as I’ve introduced my 5-year-old daughter to role-playing. So far, she eats it up.. much like your kids. Thanks so much!
Elderon Analas says
Too bad this was a April Fools joke. I would put in a good amount of my draconian wisdom. I had a few good names but, they were all in Draconic as this is my natural language and well I may try to have Alan translate them.
“(Elderon) Can you do that for me my friend?”
“(Alan) Sure, just give me a sec. And stop breathing so close to me, I can still smell that cow you ate.”
“Sorry. I’ll let you work.”
…. Moments Later ….
“(Alan) Ok, done.”
“(Elderon) Good, you should wright them down.”
“Will do, want to add a bit before I do?”
“Yeah I guess. I do love to talk.”
Well I’m going to be putting the names down and hope you like them. I know that this is all a joke but I thought they were pretty good.
Dragon of the Lonely Village
The Lone Dragon (wait that’s my book)
The Forest of Fire
I have a few others but they aren’t as good, or I don’t think they are. I will be here all day and I really enjoy talking to you people, it makes me feel like I’m part of a group. Besides talking to Alan all day can become very boring… “(Alan)Hey!”
“(Elderon) Sorry, no offense.”
“(Alan) It’s ok. Please continue.”
…As I was saying. It gets boring talking to the same person all day for a few years. So I have started expanding my horizons. And I found this site as well as Dungeon Mastering.com. It is always nice to talk to new people an I hope to make a nice stay here, mabey move a bit of me hoard as well. But, not likely. Well that’s all for me and Alan. See you guys later.
Your Dragon Friend,
Elderon Analas
ChattyDM says
@Elderon: Thanks for the nice suggestions and sending Alan to help. I see you’ve started digging in my archives dear dragon friend. I hope you didn’t plan to pick my best posts and make a pile of them to sleep on…
Not that I could stop you… but I would just HATE to send party after party of misguided Lawful Good adventurers to recover them ya know. 🙂
Elderon Analas says
I’m a nice dragon. A simple nicely worded request for your articles back would be sufficient. Well, and a nice bit of gold and a cow, or some other form of livestock.
“(Alan) Please don’t I can’t stand your meat breath, and you don’t share.”
“(Elderon) You know if I didn’t like you so much, you would be lunch, right?”
[cowers down behind laptop] “Yes, sorry. Can we just continue with your comment?”
Now, as I was saying. I like you writing, especially the one where you son tricks the dragon into thinking the prince escaped. He knows how to use his head. (and potions of invisibility) [snickers in that hissy laugh] I would like to have an encounter with him, he seems like a worthy opponent, and like he would have lots of stories. We brass dragons would rather talk than fight, but touch our gold and you’ll wake up neck deep in sand. But a nice story or a good bit of conversation will be enough to let me have a nice day.
“(Alan) It’s getting late. I can’t keep typing. you know how hard it is to translate when I’m tired.”
“Yeah I know. I’ll let you get some sleep. Just one last bit, please.”
“Yeah ok, just make it short.”
Well seeing as time is short. I will just complement on your works now and the ones to come. I hope you have some more time to check my article I got published on dungeonmastering.com (I’ll link it below). Good night my friends, may the dragon gods smile upon you as you walk The Path.
Your Dragon Friend,
Elderon Analas
My article: http://www.dungeonmastering.com/tools-resources/how-to-befriend-a-dragon Hope you like it.