Critical Hits

Everything tabletop gaming since 2005

Stealing a good idea: The 10 words adventure synopsis

by

In order to make up for my militant rant of last night, I thought I’d steal Penny Arcade’s excellent concept and give out a little brainstorming writing assignment for your RPG campaign and then share it

Here’s the assignment, write an adventure concept (any genre) in exactly 10 words and post it in the comments. Believe me, I sent in two entries to the PA contest and it’s hard to do.

Let’s make this a contest shall we? I’m opening it up for 1 full week starting on Noon EST of April 29th until the same time next week (May 6th). You enter by posting your entry in the comments here.

The best one will get a choice of a D&D mini Dungeon of Dread booster or an equivalent value Gift Certificate from DrivethruRPG.

For the contest to be valid, I need at least 20 entries from 20 different people. There are currently 265 RSS subscribers on this blog so I think it’s feasible to hope for a 7-10% participation.

You can submit multiple entries.

If I don’t get enough, I’ll still post the best entries in a later post with credits.

Actually, regardless of how it goes, I’d probably make a selection of entries (or all of them) into a PDF and offer it for free. Therefore, please note that while I will credit your entry by your true name or internet moniker, I get the rights to the entries. I don’t plan on selling any of this though.

Heres a few examples to get you started:

  • Help tiefling bastard daughter of snobby paladin quests for Birthright.
  • Castle falls from sky, PCs must uncover where it’s from (Contractions count for one word ok?)
  • Dragon ate poisonous cursed gnome, will trade hoard for relief
  • Barbarian posse drops in hell, kick Diabolic Ass, take over (Perfect for Broadsword)!

I know you can do better!

Sound off! Tell your friends, pimp that contest abroad!

Edit:

Dave the Game of Critical-hits and Jeff Rients have offered to be judges. Better shape up cuz these guys are good!

This is shaping up to be a lot more popular than I expected. If any Sponsors wants to step up to sweeten the prize deal it would be great, contact me at chattydm@chattydm.net, I’d be willing to add a permanent link of your organization in this post!

Want to see the entries in a more Digestible form? See here. The list is updated periodically as the contest progresses.

Also have a look at the Random Adventure Synopsis Generator Tommi created with the entries!

Prizes have been offered by Kobold Quarterly, Wee!!

Kobold Quarterly magazine is devoted to D&D and roleplaying games, covering fantasy, steampunk, and swords-and-sorcery at their finest.   It features articles and interviews by leading game designers    including Ed Greenwood, Keith Baker, James Jacobs, and Monte Cook.

Each issue comes with an Ecology article, new spells and monsters,  and the finest player and DM advice we can find, from super-rules-heavy design crunch to rich, meaty flavor usable in any  homebrew or published campaign setting.

Subscriptions are just $16 for 4 issues, and available at http://www.koboldquarterly.com/

Comments

  2. Mutated Undead Orcs festooned with spikes, use tentacles to seduce.

    Halfling Pie Eating Champion has challenged you! Eat or Die!

  4. Kill goblins kill goblins kill goblins kill goblins kill goblins!

    or

    Find the three golden thrushes whose song will heal king.

    or

    Players will die unless find cure hidden on level ten.

    or

    ChattyDM lost his voice. Can you find it in time?

    or

    Wizards lost plot. Can you save them from financial ruin?

    😀

    greywulfs last blog post..TheCompleatSorceress: Aaaaaaand she’s done.

  7. Sorry for your loss. The Princess is in another castle.

    The dragon came to eat you. You aren’t that tasty.

    Five caves have opened up. You get to pick one.

    The summer sun is falling upon the fair realm. Literally.

    You wake up with a written note and no kidneys.

    Somebody stole your favorite pink teddy. Which kind? Gender specific.

  8. Here are five I came up with:
    Military captain becomes undead minion to increase a deity’s influence.
    Local halfling brewery gets poisoned water. Town and trade sick.
    Assassin turns over new leaf. Opens bar. Town not happy.
    Dungeon found with lots of treasure. Everyone wants a piece.
    Crazy man attempts to create half breeds. Nature not like.

  9. Airship fleet approaches your home town, can you defend it?

    Mutant pheasants claim your child, an adventure in the wild.

    Unnatural wind claims a local kingdom, has nature turned evil?

    Technocrats’ son lost in latest project, a portal to beyond.

    The world is flooded and angle’s rule with magical fists.

    Five spells must be read to birth a new world.

    Never ending winter caused by warforged wizards and lich queen.

    Blue bolts rain from the sky, the god’s are angry.

    Pun-pun makes an entrance, sanity is all but lost.

    Nation of ghosts rise from the sea, they demand rights.

    Warehouse of berserk animated objects, no more need be said.

  10. All right! This is awesome and fun!

    7 Down, 13 to go to make the cut!

    Dave the Game as stepped in as Judge and will help me. Jeff Rients too!

    This is so cool!

  13. Benevolent active gods, evil empires, the heroes are pirate clerics.

    Searching untamed jungles on other planets for new alchemical components.

    Earth Mother is insane. Cure her to save the world.

    The President Elect has no children for the ritual sacrifice.

    The mightiest superheroes turn evil. Second stringers must stop them.

    Elderly magical girls must transform once again. Any power left?

    The best magic items are dangerously radioactive. Find a cure.

    Cheerful fairy tale characters are invading your gritty noir world.

    Anvils, dynamite etc. are suddenly fatal. Toons are dying out!

    Rogue censor programs are editing people when they jack in.

  14. (assuming this isn’t limited to D&D 🙂 )

    St. Nicolas is missing. The Prince requests your help. Now.

  15. As clem just showed… it doesn’t have to be from the Fantasy genre at all… it’s just that I’m better at it than other stuff.

    We’ve already reached the halfway point…. (I should have said 50 people)!

    Only 10 more…

  16. k 🙂 (’twasn’t there when I began)

    Elvis has returned! The world is covered in sequins. Help!

    Hunted heroes, escaping enemies, stumble into another world and meet.

  17. Why does the snow over Fairyville smell like rotting flesh?

    Vengeance does not stop with death. Whose sword is this?

    When the monkeys stop falling, the real trouble starts anew.

    Is hope for love worth pursuit for the perfect pancake?

    Stan

  18. Local church backs PCs in Anti-Paladin’s annual Three-Dragon Ante tournament. (Hyphenated words count as one, right?)

    Stressed out rain god vacations in PC’s recently droughted homeland.

    Archmages create private research demiplane. PCs must evaluate scholarly ethics.

    Why is the King sending sealed letters to 100 peasants?

    Anthropologists study dungeon. Nothing killed or looted until history traced.

  20. What happens when you crossbreed red and white dragons? Science!

    Annihilation looms. Earth’s last hope lies in the darkest shadows.

    Half-orc wizard, dwarven druid, gnome paladin. Best of friends.

    Supervillain threatens Moon destruction. Do not let UN pay ransom.

    Three signs of the Apocalypse have passed. Stop four more.

  22. A haughty, tyrannical dragon suddenly requests help defending her desmense.

    Unnatural wildfires burn the fields; who would starve our kingdom?

    Annual festival games turn deadly serious, and everyone seems complicit.

    A royal cook suspected of poisoning an ambassador claims innocence.

    A murdered lord’s spirit refuses resurrection, but haunts his heirs.

    Why would a wealthy, healthy businessman cooperate with foreign terrorists?

    Nothing’s funnier than monkeys – until everyone’s pet simians awaken overnight.

    How does one catch a doppelganger who’s gone to ground?

    Three princes go questing, but one plans to return alone.

    A mad druid holds the floodwaters hostage, threatening mass starvation.

    Several seemingly sincere sirens seek silent solace sans standard seaside solitude. (Why is alliteration so funny, anyway?)

    Someone cast explosive runes on letters offering cessation of hostilities.

    The city’s power goes out every sundown, without apparent cause.

    Who ever heard of a princess kidnapping a mighty dragon?

  23. Just one for now; maybe more to follow:

    PCs windfall actually loot stolen from dragon. Dragon is peeved.

  25. Someone burnt down the old forest, the creatures are angry.

    Borstam Keep has dissapeared and huge stone footsteps have appeared.

    Miners have found Hell. The church are pleased, it’s proof!

    The ghost of a foreign spy continues in his duty.

    Incoming meteor. Shelters must be made or underground cities taken.

    Caste of robots are transfering their minds to organic bodies.

    The ooze has taken a dwarf city. Alchemist required urgently.

    Paragon of each of civilised race required for fanastic voyage.

  26. Paragon Ape lobbies for species recognition in a suit. Hilarity ensues.

    Five Elemental Rings awarded by Wizard. You’re stuck with Heart.

    Warforged created by man. They rebelled. They have a plan.

    Giant Jedi-piloted Mecha wage war against Space Ork Cyborgs.

    Years of achievements threated by deities’ updating rules of the universe.

    Least-famous Wayons brother trapped in poorly rendered fantasy world.

  28. Liberate abused bulettes being used as ogre mage polo mounts.

    Previously plundered artifact conduit for angelic possession of PC’s son.

    Mayan human sacrifice awakens chupakabra horde nesting in limestone sinkhole.

    Run down star salesman huckster who unwittingly acquires legitimate deed.

    Hired by master dream thief to neutralize pursuing bounty hunter.

  29. Food grows scarce in post-apocalyptic wasteland. Who can help?

    The corpse appears to have the same tattoo as you.

    Something made those Imperial Guardsmen turn traitor. What was it?

    Superheroes need anonymity, so make sure he doesn’t escape!

  30. An intelligent sword demands a destined hero, their damnation ensues.

    or

    Dragon in lonely mountain seeks PC for friendship; maybe more.

  31. Stay in the tavern and adventure will come to you.

    Cathedral walls are bleeding. Clerics are confused. All is lost?

    The Tooth Fairy works alone. The Easter Bunny too. Why?

    Indians on the horizon, watching your wagons circle. Fools gold.

  35. You can’t see. You can’t move. It… is behind you.

    Goblin Hordes caravan west. What’re they running from, or to?

  39. The Horns of War! A cry is heard, “To Arms!”

    Find the forlorn friar of Festivus, or forfeit your face.

  40. Half-orc mercenary, Elven princess elope. Earn King’s ransom? Aide newlyweds?

    Who’s teaching the dwarves magic? Wizard college wants competition squelched.

    Swords against Axis: transdimensional adventurers battle Nazis for Europe’s freedom.

    Beardless dwarf merchant losing business; can kidnapped goblin barber help?

    Bardsport: minstrel in musical deathmatch lost voice! Rescue or cure!

    maxs last blog post.."…lust-mad men and lawless women in a vicious and sensuous orgy of slaughter and stupendous dance spectacles…"

  42. 1. Get kiss from lost faerie queen to save dying boy.

    2. Evil uncle steals family jewels. Retrieve them to become king.

    3. Drunken party seduced by transvestite hill giant, escape next morning.

  44. Rescue merchant’s son from mercenaries squatting at the family farmstead.

    Get Gods of Cats and Dogs to fight Rat God.

    Fiendwurm belches demons over landscape. Heroes needed for EPIC cleaning.

    Three swordsmen fighting the Isle of Wights REALLY need cleric.

    Psychically poisoned princess purloins the Terrible Tapestry of Trapmaster Tarquin.

    —-

    If we come up with more can we do a second post?

    EvilLuke

  47. Fountain of Youth found! Drinks go to the highest bidder.

    The Plane of Absolute Silence. Or is it just you?

    Dragon seeking estranged child after polyamorous youth… Could be anyone!

    In this foreign land, why does food taste like metal?

    After looting jewels, shady wizard wants them at any cost.

    Did you ever notice the moon is full EVERY night?

    You left fresh half-vampire corpses. Of course rats eat it!

    “I am your creator,” he said, “and you’re a mistake!”

    Newfound constellations form demonic sigils. Coincidence? Or potential Space Satan?

    Princess Harpy picked you as her prom date. Have fun…

  48. This is so freaking awesome!

    We have quorum, the race is on!

    I may look into getting more prizes and have categories!

    Any Sponsors interested?

  49. Alien tech powers Nazi warbots in Paris. Find the source.

    Dinosaurs in London. Time rift opened. Close at all costs.

    Nazi supersoldiers, genetically engineered. Find the lab, blow it up.

    What’s causing these sudden mutations? There’s money in rogue magic…

    Demons possess Emperor. Major-domo hires you to exorcise them. (major-domo is one word, right? Or swap for vizier)

    Across the burning sands lie untold riches… and grave dangers.

    Dwarves threaten war over lost coronation gift. A dragon stole it…

    Long-awaited crackdown on crime arrives. Pity you’re a thief

    Enough of these murderous adventurers! We goblins must stand together!

    A room 10 feet square. An orc guards a chest 😉

    The conquest was easy. Cleaning up the mess, mind you…

    Civil war over mistranslated holy scroll. Go find the original.

  53. The following entries all come from previous gaming experiences. Potato.

    Go to tavern, look at bulletin board, pick a quest.

    Prevent squirrel-induced apocalypse by collecting useless colorful orbs from everywhere.

    Hack, slash, loot, hack, slash, loot; repeat until dungeon ends.

    Kill owner of nearby manor, buy cheap at police auction.

    Noise in dry woods! Throw torch! Face angry homeless druids.

    Defend holy tree against undead legion with only you four.

    Try clearing out Lady Hagerty’s rat-infested basement without dying this time.

    Chick from future tells you, “Don’t fire DM Cannon”. DON”T!

    NOTE: The DM Cannon was a doomsday device that our characters created that used various spells to fire objects at the speed of light. After a few hours of integrating physics and D&D, we discovered that a copper piece shot through the DM Cannon would release approximately 15 megatons of energy, dealing somewhere in the ballpark of 90000000000d6. (I have the schematics on a sheet of paper somewhere. The whole thing is quite hilarious.)

    Buy new bow. Don’t burn the shop down this time.

    Save Krom from execution. He just wanted to eat cabbage.

    Convince paladin he’s not invincible before he gets you killed.

    Exchange dignity for co-adventurer’s resurrection by rolling naked in mud.

    Wipe out peaceful islanders so eccentric employer gets vacation home.

    Repent to island god by massacring several peaceful continent dwellers.

    Find new continent to adventure where everyone doesn’t hate you.

    (more coming soon)…

  56. Dying planet holds answer to everything. All life is threatened.
    Dragon and vampire apocalypse. Can heroes use Great Ghost Dance?
    Chaos reigns; broo invasion. Orlanthi cause more harm than good.
    Shadow tendrils threaten Amber; Pattern unstable; Logrus adepts take advantage.
    Elder vampires powers waning: mages suspected, mortal cult leader responsible.
    Drizz’t DoUrden brutally slain; Elminster eviscerated; Simbul disintegrated; adventurers rejoice.

    This is kind of like writing Haiku, is it not? Here’s a bit of shameless plagiarism:

    Danger rears ugly head; Sir Robin turns tail and flees.
    He’s not the Messiah, he’s just a very naughty boy.
    Why are we here? Turns out every sperm is sacred.
    Parrot is definitely deceased. And now for something completely different.

  58. A kiwi* is thrown into a lake by swiss elephant.
    Four year old girl is kidnapped by a camel driver.
    Oh shit, did you know that Rasputin isn’t dead yet?!
    If that guy doesn’t lose his virginity, all will die.
    People are turning orange. The colour, too, not the fruit!
    Electro-screws in jaw are malfunctioning. Stop me from eating everything!
    Killer giant echidnas are on the loose. Run, fucking run.
    The galaxy implodes if anyone tells another “your mom” joke!
    DM is choking on D20! Why was he eating it?!

    *A kiwi as in a person from New Zealand

  61. 1/100th size characters battle everyday insects in gladiatorial arena competition.

    Familiar hires party to infiltrate inexplicably sealed wizard master’s tower.

    Demons will invade if innocent child dies before ritual purification.

    Rebellious intelligent construct seeks assistance in achieving freedom and autonomy.

    Monster accidentally drinks love potion; sees character, changes alignment, courts.

  62. * Lich King plans grand party, PCs are the main dish

    * Robot wreaks havoc on future city, citizens cry for help

  63. Once again, all in-game experiences…

    Aliens invade from hovering castle; cast Fly, hijack that shit!

    Dragons hold capitol hostage; ram them with your new fortress.

    Collect useless items, open Garl Steppeman’s Emporium of Stuff, ???, PROFIT!!!
    (??? doesn’t count as a word, right?…if so, toss out “of” and switch it to “Stuff Emporium”)

    Escape from prison. Don’t use airducts, they’ll see it coming.

    Ally with hobgoblins to defeat tyrant; make them slaves later.

    Rebuild city in a day using Time Stop and slaves.

    Sentient bunny rabbit glues pancakes to your ceiling. Plot revenge.

    Too smart for carrot over pit trap. Try something else.

    Rabbit accidentally poisons self trying to murder you. Make stew?

  64. Des grand-mères et des chiffons, des mots qui hantent Yan.

    This is not an actual entry, just a little inside joke/poke at one of Yan’s less successful DM session.

  66. Go to Vegas, find stripper-nee-goddess, wake her up.

    Low-Earth orbit, rocks are falling- fish out useful stuff.

  67. Castle Falkenstein —

    Mr. H. G. Wells is hiring ghostbusters; specialized equipment provided.

    Inheritance letter must be delivered across world in ten days.

    Save framed Prince by finding real St. Paul’s Cathedral murderer.

    GIgantic steam-powered automaton runs amok at World’s Fair; stop it!

    I for one do NOT welcome our new martian overlords!

  68. Sneak into guarded temple, steal magical sword. Catch: It sings.

    Family’s heirloom necklace caught on Infernal Dire Boar’s Tusk. Fetch.

    Return archmage’s Iron Golem. He lives within dense rust monster population.

    Duke’s ‘niece’ is actually succubus. Sabotage wedding between noble families.

    Show up dwarven king on his own turf: DRINKING CONTEST!!

    Raise money to save orphanage from global corporation’s land grab.

    Plant bug on Dictator’s lapel while avoiding his Doppleganger bodygaurds.

    Stop Madman from unleashing Virus. His soldiers are all carriers.

    Evacuate scientist and daughter from mothership. One escape pod left.

    Aprehend father’s killer; who must be executed before your coronation.

    You’re infected with memory poison. Retrieve cure from… uh… hmmm…

    You’ll die within moments. With last breath, warn world about-

    Seek racist dwarf apothocary, convince him to heal elf companion.

    Nine bloody weapons, four impaitent heirs, One vacant throne. Whodunit?

    Powerful Artifact on Angelpearch Summit protected by Solar. Bring rope.

  69. Two entries from me (channeling Vanir a bit on the second one):

    Three demon warlords oppose each other, protect your hometown!

    The President ate some magic mushrooms, defend the Middle East!

  70. Fate of the world decided by ping pong playing orcs.

    Figure skating puzzle seals ice dungeon. Is treasure worth it?

    Twenty one sided die discovered. Can civilization handle newfound power?

    The world is disintegrating. Can it be saved? Probably not.

  72. Strictly speaking, not all of these are adventure pitches or even synopses. I went for many that could conceivably be part of the in-character dialogue from someone giving the quest, or even just a snapshot of the adventure. Anyway, read (and judge) for yourself.

    The king is dead. Why do we still hear him?
    It was once a church. Now it’s cold and unhallowed.
    The sword you seek is inside a dragon. Good luck!
    I’m not kidding: he ended up inside the troll. Yuck.
    I’ll pay you double if the kobolds eat him afterward.
    Uh, where did the city go? Oh, right: Dis. Whoops.
    I hate orcs. Kill them all. Except the hot one.
    Steel failed. Fire just angered it. You’ll think of something.
    Hey, do you like money? Do you also like murder?
    The graveyard is full of angels and the dead can’t sleep.
    Deliver him here. Ignore his words. He will only lie.
    Jewels sparkle like fire. “Bring its head and they’re yours.”
    Say nothing. This tomb has ears. Hands, too. Also: teeth.
    It started with a gnome and a bucket of ale.
    Surrender now. I won’t harm you. Honest! I never lie.
    We entered the temple. I returned afraid. He returned insane.
    You’re going to kill Bane? Who’s your next of kin?
    The bridge collapsed. The castle burned. The prince smiled quietly.
    What part of “eats people for fun” don’t you understand?
    I’ll give you ten gold if you pull this lever.
    He’s angry and he’s made of lightning. You’re immune, right?
    Doppelgangers abound. You’re safe here, though. Here, eat this, friend!
    We’re surrounded. Let’s worry about that later. The tarrasque awoke.
    I dare you to steal that lich’s phylactery. No? Chicken.
    It’s my sister’s child. My child. Do it now. Please.
    Once, long ago, someone teleported the tarrasque to the Abyss.
    Say, where can I find a book about breeding beholders?
    Bring me my mother’s right hand. She won’t need it.
    Dead men roam the swamp. Therein lies your fallen god.
    It’s sharp enough. But can you really kill your master?
    A ghostly figure. You remember her. She’s here now. Why?
    The eyeless child brings ruin. The stars will depart. Darkness.
    Hone your skills. Losing means they starve us. Beatings, too.
    Mangy. Gnawing teeth. Rats? I guess they look like rats.

    I also couldn’t resist this ripoff: “For sale: two bloodstained daggers. Very sharp. Never used. Cheap.”

    Matthews last blog post..Paizo’s Pathfinder Alpha 2

  74. Bear attack! They breathe fire! What makes them so angry?

    Earthquake rocks sleepy coastal town, annoys mayor. Next: sea monsters.

    Bad bite gets infected, arm goes all gooey. Seek help.

    Evil empire tests cyborgs on peasantry. Their one weakness? Drugs!

    The football-sized ruby? Good. The deathtraps? Not so much.

    Goblin civil war. Pick sides, or just protect the townsfolk.

    Strange disease turns flesh to gold. Who gets the vaccine?

    Villain kidnaps your best friend. Then she does it again.

    Nobles getting married. Crash it, kidnap the bride and groom.

    Clockwork gorilla has a map in heart, murder on mind.

    You are unwashed Scots. Hide, then restore the deposed king.

    Chaos magic messes with city finances. “Solution” summons tentacle horror.

    History class interrupted by dinosaurs. Is it on the final?

    Dinosaur Escape: Washington DC. All agree, the best filibuster ever.

    Wizard builds a better fireball. Guild says: Take him out.

    Escape from Dr. Zod’s twisted lair. Main complication: robot mongeese.

    Jewels of Tanar’zhu are missing! Vizier did it, hates apostrophes.

    Warlord seems okay guy, keeps ordering you to slaughter peasants.

    Godzilla attacks New York. Again. Bored, no good movies playing.

    oddyseys last blog post..Metal Steampunk Vikings

  76. Giant Legendary Ape terrorizes frightened city, just wants some nookie.

    Bobby the Paladin keeps dreaming of naked Clerics, blames youth.

    Boy sells his cow for beans, has a giant erection.

    Balrogs forge alliance, play benefit concert for convicted Hobbit plagiarizer.

    Wizards Confuse young Halflings into conducting melee with playing cards.

    Adventurers keep vanishing, seems the dreaded “Mmo” is consuming them.

    Umm…Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain?

    Boy saves his city from disaster by fingering a dike.

    Wizards flog a dead horse, convinced it’s full of life.

    Grognard takes up his lance, mistakenly charges Windmills. Then Wife.

    Daves last blog post..Ten Times Ten

  78. Horses have disappeared, replaced by coconuts. Furious paladins blame swallows.

    Elderly historian killed in ride-by slashing, arrest the gallant perpetrator.

    Knights require a shrubbery, a good one. Find it- GAH!

    Tim warns, “Bunny: incredibly dangerous.” Not on stump, disregard him.

    Mysterious last words scrawled on cave wall, “AAAAAARRRRRRGGGHH…”; cryptologists baffled.

  99. Farmer topples standing stones – threshold to another dimension gapes open.

    Frost giant shaman steals Drum of Winter – will spring arrive?

    You wake up chained to galley oar – escape or perish!

    Help Templar ghost guard gate to Hell under Solomon’s Temple

    Nazi occultists revive dead soldiers by truckload for Eastern front

  100. A few more:

    Cemetery symbols removed – the Dead just want to return home

    Persuade sleeping giant to teach you forgotten Songs of Power
    (the Kalevala, rune XVII)

    Brave Wall of Serpents to woo daughter of the North
    (the Kalevala, rune XXVI)

  101. Hi,

    Just a question re the rights. Do you mean you get just the rights to re-publish entries for free, like in the pdf you mentioned, or do you mean you get the rights altogether?

  102. The rights to re-publish for free in PDF form as well as derive (and keep) advertisement revenue generated by traffic to them on this blog.

    You can reprint the ones you wrote here as you see fit.

  104. Probably should be working but these just came to me:
    Old technology needed for viewing secret data. Go find it.
    Identification Database gets virus. Screws your identity. Clean it up?
    Mailed movie rental service used by terrorists to send data.
    You are computer felon. Uncover plot. Need to convince authorities.
    You are hired to rig election. Candidate kills your mom.
    You fathered illegitimate son. Need aire to throne. It’s him?
    Cult camped outside city. Will commit mass suicide very soon.
    Grab cursed gem. Town to perish. It’s all your fault.

  105. Old man says he is not a dragon. He is.

    Gnomes want to become werewolves for respect. Capture one alive.

    The robot impersonating the king is doing a better job.

    Anyone who follows the rainbow does not come back. Why?

    Driud stuck in bear form. Heroes need info from him.

  106. Lost and within the footprint of a Tarrasque, they awoke.

    “They came from the north, with the gnashing of teeth.”

    A bard, goblin, and a lich walk into a bar.

    Endless rains, flash flooding, sinkholes, and pirates. Aquatic Campaign: GO!

  107. @Gospog: Long time no see man! Thanks for the submission.

    @jeffx:

    Probably should be working but these just came to me

    Was that intentional? 🙂

  109. Terrible fate it is to marry monster – squishy, defenseless human.

    The world will burn – you have three days. Have fun.

    The riddle was spoken: 3, 4, 7, 11. Answer promptly.

    A glorious host of paladins to be buried, for now.

    Phil, could community project be turned into a random generator?

    The summer is coming, the ice melting. Where to live?

    Why was Descartes forgotten? How to defeat the ubiquitous demon?

    Tommis last blog post..Now playing

  110. @Marcel: Hey a friend from Gatineau (According to the Forums where you linked to me) Salut!!!

    @Tommi: I take it that your clever 10 word request was semi-serious. That would be cool… but apart from rolling all of them in a data table and getting one out randomly I couldn’t fathom how to create a 10 word plot generator. (Actually even the random thing is beyond my skills… volunteers needed)

  111. Tarrasque disturbed prematurely. Evacuation required. Loot as you go. Profit!

    High-level cleric excommunicated. Seeks revenge against her deity and church.

    Noble’s adventurous daughter needs bodyguards. Visiting Carceri can be deadly.

    Elvis reincarnated as two-headed wolf boy. Needs to be housebroken.

  113. New virus targets bionics. Street Samurai everywhere, go line dancing.

    The Great Old Ones suddenly take an interest in you.

    Cabalists need sacrific to summon Cthulhu. Guess who they want.

    It’s a beautiful day. All is serene. Let’s break stuff!

  114. First time commenter – I have a ton of these in a spreadsheet now.

    Guards vanish then Merchants then Commoners Leaving Only Council. Why?
    Deep holes appear everywhere. Those who enter vanish. Where?
    The Sun didn’t come up. Stars are gone. The prophecy?
    One murder then a second and third. Blame the children.
    Orcs at the gates begging for succor. Goblins close behind.
    You’re in a maze of twisty passages all look alike.

    Chgowiz…

  115. @Chgowiz: Hey thanks for making the jump to commenter! I think this is a fantastic exercise to get a campaign drawn up.

    I’m not going to run out of ideas any time soon!

    A gazillion thank yous to all! I’m feeling a bit sheepish with my lone box of Minis…

    Chatty peeks out of his Overlord cave, wondering if the flood is subsiding,..

  116. Here’s one:

    Phil makes a killer adventure post, gets two hundred comments

    Oh, wait, it’s been done 😉

    How about these:

    PC’s benefactor murdered by randomly ravening horde of fomorian foes.

    Disguised antagonist steals all-powerful artifact from under party’s nose.

    Party wakes up in alternate universe, i.e. Drow are good.

    I’m sure I’ll have some more later.

    Oh, and you’re right. This Sooooo needs to be a PDF. I’d have even paid for it 😉

    Bob at DnDReviewss last blog post..How to Stop Sucking and Kick Ass as a Dungeon Master

  117. @Bob: Now I’m starting to understand how high traffic bloggers feel… Sheesh, how does Shamus get any work done?

    Securing rights for a paid product written by so many people would have been a nightmare… I’ll offer it for free and host it on the site. Just don’t expect a fancy layout.

  118. ChattyDM : LOL @ Des grand-mères et des chiffons! Souvenirs de jeunesse de GURPS. 😉

    Here’s my meager contribution… too busy today to think of anything else… but I really love the idea and I’m happy for your blog’s success!

    “Who needs a mage when you already are a God?”

  120. Nordic gods return to lead Nazi’s in WWII – Allies losing.
    (Superhero games are RPGs too…)

  122. A plague rat infestation is more than anyone bargained for.

    Space aliens invade Middle Earth in a Victorian-looking mothership.

    Astronauts make emergency landing; undiscovered alien natives take violent offense.

    Will players realize the campaign is based on song lyrics?

    King without heir obsessed with relic. Steal and ransom it.

  124. “Long time no see man! Thanks for the submission.”

    Hey Chatty,

    Yeah, it’s been a really wierd year. I had you bookmarked at my old work PC and then I wasn’t working there anymore…well, after that GMing blogs kind of fell by the wayside as I searched for a new job.

    At my next job, I was not allowed to eat lunch or take breaks. Again with the priorities.

    At my new job, I am treated well, get regular breaks and a whole carrot at the end of the day if I do a good job! I saw this link off of Jeff Rient’s blog (which I can now read again as well) and jumped right over!

    Sorry, I am rambling and off-topic. It’s nice to be back. Consider yourself re-bookmarked!

    -Tom

  126. The empire built on the wasteland festers; underground, something awakens.

    You all meet in a bar. Chaos, hilarity, slaughter ensues.

    The king is dead! One problem: you’re the king.

    Arcane and Divine magics switch, meanwhile Druids make their move.

    Unstoppable juggernaut rolls towards the Eternity Gate. Find the source.

    mikes last blog post..BEARS

  128. I try real hard not to comment on the actual submissions… as I should.

    Suffice it to say that some of them are drop-from-my-chair funny and a lot are pure gems.

    Will this hit the 200 comment mark? Who knows? I’m starting to think that Dave and Jeff will regret stepping forward to judge…

  134. @James: I see you’re on a roll. If your submissions are any inkling about the Adventures you GM/DM, I’d peg you definitively in the Retro-Stupid camp. 🙂

  136. Fantasy game. 3 requests from each player. Thinking…. Let’s rock.

    Mad God’s temple: will you find riches or insanity? Mwahahahahaha!

  139. Pretty, pagan Princess passively pilfers priest’s prophetic pockets – Parish Panics!

  140. Ah I see someone is taking the alliteration path… (I’ve seen at least another one before)

    Is that a challenge?

    Anyone care to try to make it into a Palindrome (words) or full palindrome (letters)?

  144. Classic adventure, in ten words:
    Kick down doors, slay the baddies, steal all the loot.

  148. Some genre variety:

    1. “Evil I slayed that others could live,” quothe the Paladin.

    2. Space derilict drifts into sight… valuable salvage, or certain doom?

    3. Someone let the kender control the time travel device? Oops.

    4. You gaze upon the face of Cthulhu. Roll for insanity.

    5. The end is nigh. The giant robots must be stopped.

  149. Resurrections cause rupture in boundary between life and death. Repair.
    Gnome must collect all mustard jellies to revive ancient hero. (2nd Edition)
    Elven encampment is actually a colony of albino drow. Surprise!
    Tarrasque spontaneously starts reproducing asexually. World seeks Tarrasque birth control.
    Depressed demigod attempts suicide with disastrous results. Cheer him up.
    Death god is slain and suddenly no one can die.

  150. White dragon attacks nomandic tribe? Sounds like “Barbarians on Ice”.

    In honor of the CPU error I got 5 minutes ago:
    Chatty exceeded his quota. Upgrade time. Send in the Ninja.

  152. Hi! First time commenter!

    Betrayed baron returns for vengeance disguised as entertainer, wants help.

    Planted crops stand up, migrate south, children claim stalks talk.

    Goblin tribes unite, form nation under prophet leader, pet basillisk.

    Lesser storm goddess calls in debts, destroys what’s not offered.

    Day of Fools tournament in forest: Go, hunt, play pranks.

    I’m going to have to think about this…

  153. Palindrome, as requested. Not much of an adventure, more like the memory of a failed one…

    Dog mood: sword was evil – live saw drow’s doom god!

    More traditional ones:

    Far Northern winter – sun doesn’t rise, the dead won’t rest

    Sinister creatures offer to repel invaders, but at what cost?

  154. Disease spreading from unknown source – connected to rise of ritualists?

  155. These are the best I could do on short notice, enjoy!

    The Sunkiller seeks its divinity through a dead god’s remains.

    Free the Paladin-king, reclaim his soul from the seven crows.

    An elder vampire seeks help destroying spawn, do you dare?

    Restore the Remshibar clans warlocks, imprisoned within the Wraith Blade.

    The Wight Lord has besieged your city-state, resist the undead.

    Cunning were-rats are mining plague-steel, stop them before it spreads.

    The Magister’s College is abandoned, re-take it from the golems.

    Twelve kingdoms sponsor the Great Griffin Race, can you win?

    The last royal heir is found, restore the sundered throne.

    Break the Temporal Lock, or the next sunrise never comes.

    –Nathan

    nw_meyers last blog post..[4E] Multi-classing

  158. Genius kobold manipulates reality to become God. Fix the loophole.

    Bard only talks in iambic pentameter. Find a cure. Lobotomy?

    Cat decapitates commoner in surprise round. Acquire a competent familiar.

  163. I spent way too much time making these palindromes up:

    Lost! I wait… I’m mad dammit! I, a wit, SOL.

    “Evitarr, an evil here?”
    “Red Rum Murderer!”
    “eh.”
    live narrative.

    An era, A dog, a panic in a pagoda arena! (middle already famous)

    Pots! No Garden? old evil Deified! lived lone Dragon. stop!

    So they are a bit of a stretch, I tried. Maybe tomorrow I’ll be able to think of regular hooks. I’m stuck on 10 word sentences, with terrible grammar too!

  164. @ Mak and BobG: I’m impressed… and humbled.

    @Yan: Niiice! Yeah I do remember when this was a one reader blog… thanks for hanging around!

    @BobY: Lol, I was expecting that one so much sooner!

    (Must resist giving new challenges… )

  166. Here are a few more:

    Child vampire “turns” orphanage into minion army. Plans world acquisition.

    Rediscover zombified planet’s technology for homeworld’s protection from similar fate.

    Ocean is emptying. Must find solution before world dries up.

  168. Chatty, a tip from Web 2.0: have your commenters nominate the best ones from this thread, then vote on a top ten. You won’t have to do the work of culling it yourself, and the top ten will probably be funnier and get more people interested in reading the whole thread.

  169. Noumenon – I’d love to see a suggestion on how to sanely and effectively hold a poll with over 200 options. Especially one that wouldn’t actually result in more work for the judges, rather than less.

  170. Tomorrow I’m going to move all of this to the forums in a Judge only section Paizo style and we’ll start going through it.

    Of course there are lessons learned here for any other stunt like that that I decide to pull… 🙂

  171. Phil, re: Random generator. I linked to Abulafia on purpose. I was thinking about simply copying all of the generated entries into one or several generators there. It’s a wiki with easy syntax, I could add this material there if I only had the rights to do so. (This is a subtle request to get you to say “Go ahead and make a random generator with these entries.”).

    Tommis last blog post..Now playing

  173. As I started cleaning these up in a Word File for later judging, I started realizing that some smart alecs were using entries as ways of conveying subtle messages about other entries…

    I was slow there… I’m not that smart…

  174. Graham: I said they should “vote on the top ten.” I was just remembering how Ace of Spades had a “Dick Cheney Facts” contest, then a second “Best of” thread consisting only of ones that the commenters found hilarious enough to copy and paste over. That made it easy for me to pick my top 13 (Example: Dick Cheney refuses to wait for a heart attack to come… He has spent years planning a pre-emptive strike.)

  175. Man, I can hardly see that my comment has links in it due to the “light blue, no underline” style looking almost the same as black text to me.

  178. (This was my former GM’s idea. Posting it for her. Was a great story, too bad we never finished it.)

    Modern day teenagers brought to mythic Ireland for God’s Game.

  184. @Noumenon: Thanks for the tips. I’ve posted the entries in the forum and I’m pondering what can be done (I’ll talk to the judges)

    As for the link, is it that bad? I see it fine but results vary from browser to browser and screen types.

  185. @ChattyDM: OK.

    This isn’t the gnome’s kingdom – it’s an exact, clockwork replica!

    A ghoul, disgusted by the killing of animals for food.

    The severed head of a great orator, still making speeches.

    Dark portents in the stars, and blood in the sky.

    A shambling horror, falsely accused and without a single defender.

    A dungeon, where the treasure consists entirely of glass eyes.

    The painting of the city is really the city itself.

    A dungeon where every encounter requires the Use Rope skill.

  188. @ChattyDM: On your list, you dropped ‘Live Narrative’ from my entry. After finding a few 10 word palendromes, I can’t stop. Everything must be no more or less than 10 words.

    Dimensional travel to a popular setting from another game/movie.

    Pandemic! Must find cure, and find new bodies for dead.

    Talking cheetah challenges party to a race: for map home.

    Scavenger Hunt! Find: his head, the weapon and the murderer.

    Kill dragon, get maiden, get paid. Not in that order?

    Anything touched turns gold, for an hour. Midas has debts.

    I’m tired and done for now, although I might win. I almost want another challenge, the first was quite entertaining. BTW, every sentence I’ve written thus far has 10 words. 🙂

  190. I’ve degenerated into adapting movies. Still mixed with experiences, though!

    Crazy 88 killers terrorize village. Kill…wait…THERE’S 102! WTF?!

    Modify cybernetic arm to move unnaturally. Thrive as street performer.

    “Supa Dupa Wookiee Crispa” discovered. Are they crispers or crispees?

    Our sun is dying. Ride a bomb into it! YEEEEEEHAWWWWW!

    LG hamlet has little crime, many accidents. Investigate, guns blazing.

    Players get 23 on checks after watching Carrey film. Coincidence?

    Women everywhere, sterile. Well, all except one. Protect the baby!

    One ring must be destroyed. Why walk? Catapult! Mangonel! Trebuchet!

  192. @ BoB G: I’ll review and correct… sorry.

    @Melissa: Hey thanks for stopping by and leaving an entry!

    @Reverend Mike: Hot Fuzz Reference! You win the Super Secret Bacon prize of the day!

    🙂

  193. Bacon?! SWEET!! Bacon Bacon Bacon Bacon Bacon Bacon! It’s BACON!!

    Lead gnome commoner strike force to defeat pig-man overlord, Hogger.

    Terrorists attack National City Guard Convention. Inept remainder needs back-up.

    Ancient catacombs discovered under tavern basement. Adventurers flock; admission charged.

  194. An intelligent storm has stolen people’s ability to have faith.

    A castle’s owner dies and posesses it, rampaging across time.

    Assassin children infiltrate society at the behest of the King.

    Sean Freemans last blog post..Re: I watched a movie!

  195. slaver raid, airship chase, cult volcanic sacrifice thwarted, demon unleashed!

    masquerade party mistaken identity, framed for kidnapping, burning building rescue.

    and to withdraw from the cultural bank…

    “Help me Obi-wan Kenobi, you’re my only hope,” said Leia.

    “They’ve stolen my wife! Send your armada; we’ll rescue her!”

    “Only a clever ruse will work after this siege. Listen…”

    You are cordially invited to the Nakatomi Corporation Christmas Party.

    “It’s an obscure body in the S-K system, your Majesty…”

    Bens last blog post..Design Log: The Black Art of High APL Encounters

  196. (I think this is becoming an addiction 😀 )

    The world is ending. You can make it less horrific.

    Everyone is suspiciously healthy. Is it something in the water?

    Dragon seeks love, requests adventurers carry presents to distant penpal.

    Kublai Khan’s stately pleasure-dome is deserted, loot-worthy, and possibly haunted. (with apologies to Coleridge)

  197. Hey Sandrinnad, we provide only the best of stuff here at Chatty DM’s… 🙂

    Are we taped out already? Come on people, you’re making our judges lives too easy here!

    🙂

  198. Might as well contribute:

    Rumours are, that an army is forming. Care to investigate?

    Something is amiss in town. People are disappearing at night.

    Investigators required to thwart the returns of a loftcraftian horror.

    Rise of the archlich in a steampunk meets vampire universe.

    Transporting military secret experiment, can be hazardous to your health.

  200. Yes it is and it generated 200 comments which is a first on that blog, IIRC.

  202. oh _definitely_ the good stuff Chatty 😀 (here for my daily hit 🙂 )

    40 teenagers camp by a lake. Your mission? Die amusingly.

    Explore covenant, research spells, get powerful, research spells, explore covenant.

    Someone’s stealing from the past – find them and stop them.

  205. I can’t get any examples to post (tried three times), but basically, links that look like http://www.whatever.com and the Permalinks by each comment are fine, because they are in bold, but links that you make with a href= have the same font weight as normal text and the letters aren’t thick enough for me to tell the difference between blue and black.

    It’s not just your blog, tinyrevolution.com has the same thing.

  208. Weave destroyed. Find Boccob’s Band of Arcanity. Restore multiversal order.

    Newly ascended gods attack Material Plane. Older pantheons mighty pissed.

  210. Naked nymphs, mocking your impotence: the Book of Nuerotic Fantasy.

    GURPS: Tom of Finland LARP rules alienate some, liberate others.

    Criminals steal time machine! They must have been stopped! Then!

    George decided to demonstrate the difference between Lawful and Good.

    ..in an eternal loop, you escape but find yourself trapped…

  212. Decendants of an ancient empire return to find world chaos.
    Infultrate pure evil empire, gods will absolve you of sins.

  213. links that look like http://www.whatever.com and the Permalinks by each comment are fine, because they are in bold, but links that you make with a href= have the same font weight as normal text and the letters aren’t thick enough for me to tell the difference between blue and black.

    http://criticalanklebites.com
    http://criticalanklebites.com
    criticalanklebites

    Two links made through two different methods. The first is using [a href], the second is just the url. The third is another [a href] without a url in the text as a test.

    Testing…

    Sorry, Noumenon. All links on this page, whatever method they’re posted by, look identical.

  214. Legendary performing troupe has lyric competition. Devise more than rest.

    Schizophrenic psion knows government secrets. Protect her and discover truth.

    Town considers PC hero for unknown reason. Mayor wants revenge.

    Drunk PC gets hitched. Wife has hidden agenda. OH NOES!

    Isolated society considers witchcraft to be technology and vice versa. WTF?

    Elven noble despairs, unable to grow beard. Cure facial baldness.

    Chancellor goes mad. “Universe reduces to singularity. Pi!” Key lime?

    Newspaper mogul dies. Mysterious last words. Find sled before incineration.

    Hunter of dead goes crazy, hunts living with silver hammer.

    Entire campaign is really TV show. Throw dice at DM.

    Unbeknownst to public, superpowered assassins coexist. Investigate their sinister motives.

    Killer tomatoes attack! “Seriously?” “Yep! Stop ’em.” “Lamest. Adventure. Ever.”

  215. Ripped from the headlines (The Onion headlines, that is):

    Ghouls Rebel, plan so crazy it just might paralyze everyone!

    Maxs last blog post..In the Rage

  217. Your links looked identical to me at work on IE, Yan, so I came back home to Firefox — they still look identical. Im a doof, I guess, it’s not the font weight at all. Well, what’s a few wasted comments among in a 200-post thread. Anyway, it gave me an idea:

    You’re colorblind to beat hypnotic pattern? Meet this gray dragon.

  218. No worries, Noumenon, though it was me and not Yan.

    I will talk to Chatty about the link issue, though, and we’ll figure something out.

  227. Universe is disintegrating. Elder god responsible. Heroes must escape. Where??

  228. Port city’s eggs cause explosive diarrhea. Why’re they so GOOOOOOD?

    DM checks carrying capacities. Some loot must be disgarded. Lame.

    New campaign. First adventure – salvage mission: collect disgarded loot pile.

    Young scholar pulls all-nighter. Get him rested before final starts.

    2 of them…hour from now…haven’t slept yet…ugh…

  231. In the food court, your soup is accused of treason.

    Bloody Health and Safety. It’s *meant* to be a deathtrap.

    Drive rogue supercomputer insane. Ask it about Attacks of Opportunity.

    Ron Jeremy sues Wizards over their new race, the Engorged.

    The Gods announce an upcoming new edition of the universe.

    Game about magic vampire wars makes your game look immature.

  232. FATAL Expansion introduces Were-Goatses, Tubgnomes, and Two Gnolls, One Cup.

    Game about magical vampire wars introduces new maturity to role-playing.

    [the 2nd one is meant to be a ‘corrected’ version of the similar one in post 231].

  233. One down, physics to go…SWEET! There are categories now!…

    Warrior-king’s spirit haunts operahouse. “Madness?…THIS!…IS!…OPERA!!!” Exorcise him.

    Retrieve Armor of Invincibility from the Cave of No Return.

  234. Rescue President’s daughter from clan of alien-human-hybrid cultists.

    Stop Neo-Nazi’s from rebooting Hitler’s cryogenically preserved brain.

    Pilfer the basement of my Aunt Sadie’s purported haunted house.

    Deliver a satchel of condoms to the Religious Underground Movement.

    tims last blog post..One long orgy of role-playing

  235. Kingpin who framed characters murdered. Who stole his tongue? Why?

    Gorilla legionnaires take gala hostage. Demand polyoscillium returned. Whay’s polyoscillium?

    Why is everything on fire? I hate PCs so much.

    Nazi supersoldiers drag diplomat to sewers of 1960s berlin.

  237. Nazi supersoldiers are cliché. Werewolf Women of the SS Win!

    Sewers flooded with toxic waste every night. Just in case.

    Creatures escape from zoo! Shouldn’t have taunted the caged dragon.

    Dolphins everywhere have disappeared. Search for them. Bring a towel.

  238. Boom! Smoke! He appears. “Oh…that’s what that spell does.”

    A half-flooded cave, where a cult worships the sea demons.

    An ancient sorcerer-king sleeps, preserved by his dark arts.

    In a hidden cove, pirates have founded a secret city.

    An insane god-king, his home palace, prison and tomb.

    The kind and heroic priest of a vile demon god.

    A city of ruins, filled with angry and vicious spirits.

    A missionary who has secretly converted to his hosts’ religion.

    An army of animates waiting for their dead masters’ return.

    The tattooed skin of a great king, tanned and cured.

    A skeleton race, who grow flesh and muscle after death.

  239. An underground inn, filled with all tribes of the underworld.

    A mirror whose reflection has a devious plan for escape.

    A ship, equally at home in the sea or clouds.

    A noble’s rickshaw, pulled by a finely-dressed animated skeleton.

    A giant scarab beetle, carapace polished and studded with jewels.

    An abandoned building, secretly used as a site for duels.

    Fauns and dryads, raucously celebrating the death of an enemy.

  240. A castle, in ruins and overgrown but for one tower.

    The corpse of a prophet, preserved by trick or miracle.

    A clockwork ogre, the crowd’s favourite at the public executions.

    A wagon full of a non-existent denomination of gold coins.

  243. PCs ambushed by Hatfields, earn trust, resolve feud. Or not.

    For sale: baby medusa shoes, never worn. Find rightful owner.

    Find guru: climb, rockslide, yeti’s, chasm, whiteout, receive wisdom, return.

    Mafia birthday party. PC’s entertain kids, repel crashers. Refuse “offer”?

    1000 gp bounty for each greased dire blink-pig caught.

  244. Pesky pixies pants PCs, powerful pixie princess pleads: “Parlay, perhaps?”

  245. 1. Forge alliances, fortify defenses, train dinosaur cavalry – yuan-ti armies march.
    2. Sleeping god’s nightmares invade waking world. Kill? Imprison? Cure?
    3. Idiot king’s intelligent sword advisor stolen. Recover, before kingdom crumbles.
    4. Baal develops eldritch nukes – demons mutate, angels duck and cover.
    5. A map, an ancient treasure, a flying ship: Sky Pirates!
    6. PCs, dwarves, goblins – in Carceri, each with 1/4 way out.
    7. Magical drug grants sorcerous power, communication with dead. Side effects?
    8. Flocks of ravens gather to witness birth of half-ogre messiah.
    9. Crucial artifact prize in gladiatorial arena. PC’s sibling enters match.
    10. Evade golems, empty vault, out-maneuver pursuing dragons in canyon. Easy!

  246. Plague cult is looking for ancient tome in remote orphanage.

    Find the serial killer of harlots for desperately amorous noble.

    Falsify the magic scrolls by stealing secret gnome printing technology.

  250. LOL another of those ‘message to commenters/judges’ entry… 🙂

    We’ve established that any future contest would have limited entires.

    Lessons were learned here, apologies to all.

  254. The contest is closed, heartfelt thanks to all creative participants

    🙂

    I’ll keep you all posted on how we’re go at it for the judging…

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