The (annotated) case reports of Agent James (Kevin) Smith: Introduction
Decrypted from a junk post on alt.conspiracy.inconnu on November 8, 2007. Author: woKened_up_S75.
It’s so easy to steal copies of classified reports when you happen to be the one who wrote them… well at least, technically speaking I did.
I finally made the classes and am just one day shy of being a fully licensed Intrusion Detection Agency agent (IDA for all those Cold-War nostalgics ). Yup, I actually get a paycheck from the Department of Homeland security… How’s that for irony?
Keeping a low profile has been hard. I’m surrounded by so many idiots who still refuse to see things as they truly are that I often think about shooting them as a service. They even hired some of THEM, the very ones we few Awakened were put on this good earth to fight!
Sometimes when I hear James being all polite and comprehensive with those other IDA dweebs, especially the non-human ones , I have to spend inhuman (HA!) efforts to stay hidden and bide my time! Still, I must stay calm and see what is their game in all this… Are they double agents working for the Inconnu? Or are they truly “people” with enough remaining humanity to honestly want to fight the Inconnu to be freed of possession?
Don’t even get me started on Mages and Demons… What is this, Dungeons and Dragons? They should all be lined up and shot before they come and bite a chunk out of our collective asses.
Anyway, I’m just posting this as a little primer for what I got cooking for you: Front row seats to the inner workings of Big Brother himself and his “conflict” against the “Inner Enemy”… It’s an alien invasion you tax-money burning morons! Even James had this one right all those years ago… and look what’s happened to him last year… Poor old James, what a naive, broken-up schmuck. He’s lucky I’m around because he’d have been either a Vampire’s Bitch or some trophy on a Werewolf’s Necklace. How I hate these bastards
But I digress,… I have to go … James will “wake up” soon and I don’t want him to suspect anything… yet. I’m like his very own Big Brother now (double HA!) , looming over his shoulder, looking out for both of us.
What I meant to say was that I shall forward you our case report notes, using our newly implemented bio-encryption algorithm. While they’ll be written in James’ usual dry and, frankly, quite boring, style, I’ll pepper it with any juicy bits (both literal and figurative) and insight my dear alter ego might have missed… fortunately, I gathered most of the marbles he lost…
Tomorrow is our last training mission. After that we’ll be allowed to go out into the world without training wheels. We’re luckier than most other agents since my teammates, Clarke (Furry), Dindler (Sucky) and Gunther (Awakened, barely) might actually turn out to be competent…
Don’t worry dear James, I’ll see you through this. Just remember this , when in doubt, just grab your gun…
Chatty DM: Sorry for the bit of fiction-inspired introduction… I know I can never bear to read those in RPG books. I’m banking real hard on the ‘You Write it and I’ll read it’ demographics for this particular post. So yes, starting tomorrow, the McWod campaign log is going to take the form of my character’s Case Reports being hijacked by, well… my character and posted on some freak Newsgroup. Hope you’ll enjoy it.
Cooperative World Building
Image source: Hollow World, Basic D&D campaign SettingEarlier today, my pal Yan was telling me how much he liked the fact that I took players ideas and in-game decisions to shape the campaign world’s past and present. It’s true. From campaign to campaign, the players also occasionally glean events, places or people that were shaped by the adventures of prior characters.
Like many DMs, I’m a bit of a failed writer (well not so much failed as untried… But I don’t have a closet novel!!! Much less one featuring a Quirky Thief, a Dour Dwarf, an Atypically good Dark-skinned Elf and a Noble Barbarian… honest!). What I lack in stories and campaign notes I make up in oral legends that stands for my game world’s continuity. Most of my fantasy campaigns of the last 20 or so years have occurred on the same map whose land masses are roughly the size of Europe. The stories we swap about old games there are part of the world’s legends. When I refer to past events, my oldest players remember being part of this. (I guess Old-school Grognards play a lot like this). And that makes their attachment to the current game so much stronger.
A lot of the things that have shaped my home-brewed world were created by or strongly influenced by players character concepts or actions. A few examples:
- I have an order of Elven Mages that still lead the Elven Kingdoms. Said order was a creation of Math more that 20 years ago.
- I have a tribe of Barbarian warriors that rear and train wolves to accompany them (Before D&D 2.0). Also created by Math.
- When a world-wide alignment-based war broke out in our first D&D 3.5 campaign, each character was given the choice to decide which alignment he would champion and the collective choices of the player shaped the alliance won that war.
- Yan’s creation of a Pixie belonging to a Fey noble house (a type of creature I have never liked or played with before) is currently sparking new plot hooks and new opposing organizations that will play an active role in the campaign. And I look forward to it!
- One of Franky’s character had a long evil period in which he purposely spread a Demonic Plague that still threatens the world today.
Let the players build the world. The DM should be the gardener that tends it.
The start of a new thing
Shamus of DM of the Ring fame has completed his first Opus.
Before even letting the dust settle he presents us with his new comic over at the Fear the Boot site.
Like a lot of his readers I stumbled upon DM of the Ring quite by accident somewhere around the story arc of the 1st movie. If you’ve never heard of that guy, click on the link! Its pure RPG satire gold!
His new comic, Chainmail Bikini has a strangely familiar feel. It’s like finally meeting people you only chatted with. The 1st episode is promising (its funny actually, I’m being a bit of a snob here), is not a screen capture comic and has a nice artsy feel to it.
I wish Shamus (who has absolutely no idea who I am) best of luck. In my opinion, his potential as a webcartonist is equal to Penny Arcade and Questionable Content. Shamus, should you ever get a that point, I wish you a successful Cerebus and not a First and Ten.
Spoiler alert!
I’m actually debating with my friend Yan on Gtalk which character played whom in DM of the Ring comic. While the DM is self evident and so was Gimli, I felt that Josh was Legolas. Yan believes that, based on snarkyness and appearance, Josh actually played Aragorn. I’m not convinced.
What do you guys think?
Happy B'day Shamus
Shamus Young of DM of the Ring fame turns 36 today.
Happy Birthday man! You created something really big and cool and we appreciate you doing it for us. I’m really curious about what’s coming next. I speculate that it will be a RPG satire (confirmed) but probably based on his own gaming photos instead of Screencaps.
Back to gaming: Mana Screw!!!!!
Ok enough about travel stuff and financial editorials. I’m back from my vacation so this means I’m back into the gaming mood.
As most married-with-a-life Casual Magic the Gathering player, I have a love-hate relationship with this game. Like most of my gaming buddies that play D&D and Magic, we have very limited time to play. A few hours every 2 weeks at the most. I see these gaming evening or 1/2 days as shining nuggets of good stuff…
… and then I spend this hard-earned nugget of free time being freaking mana screwed for 2 straight 2-headed giant games ! Sigh.
I’m not a sore loser, and I am philosophical enough to accept that sometimes the Gods of Magic just plain hate you, but last Friday was a Epic level Mana Screwed night. I don’t usually have significant Mana issues with my deck, I usually play between 22 and 24 lands per 60 card deck, well balanced color-wise with a classic mana curve. I mean, I have read a gazillion Magic articles on Starcity in the last 5 years…. some of it finally stuck. But last Friday… just wow!
What’s frustrating also is that when you play in team games, the mana screw also ends up affecting your buddy’s enjoyment of his evening.
Thanks god my friends are good sports and were not mean about it…. But hear me oh gods of cardboard crack. I’ve burnt thousands of dollars on your 5 color altar, next time I want a full evening of god draws!!!!
(Well to be perfectly honest, I’ve been having god draws on a regular basis for quite a number of nights before…. I guess that last friday was just a friendly reminder by the gods that what they Giveth, can and will be taketh away)….. Oh well, gotta go to the card store!
Oh and thanks Math for the Bird of Paradise (my first) and Royal Assassin (my 2nd). This was a good trade!
Peace out boys!
Web Comics
While discussing about Webcomics with my friends the other day I got the idea of listing the ones I read regularly and those I have read in the past.
Comics I created (hey, self promotion, it works!)
- The Life of a Suburban Overlord: My One-panel Photo webcomic about an underachieving Evil Overlord trying to make it through modern life.
- Chatty’s Out of the Box: My currently suspended attempt at a Photo webcomic based on my D&D minis collection.
Reading now:
- Girl Genius: Beautifully drawn Techno-Gaslight Action ! My favorite Comic!
- Gunnerkrigg Court: A techno-fantasy tale set in a very special British boarding school. Awesome storytelling, mixing Neil Gaiman and Harry Potter tropes with a supercool female character.
- Order of the Stick: One of the best D&D comics around!
- Questionable Content: This one is truly a must read! It’s like Friends, only funnier!
- Goblins: One of the Best D&D themed comics. Funny and intense. The fight scenes take forever but it’s so worth it. Updates have become very slow… probably because Tarol Hunt needs to buy food and stuff.
- Darth and Droids: A Screen-cap comic in the style of DM of the Ring about Roleplaying through the 6 Star Wars movies.
- Penny Arcade: A classic. Video Games humour and comments
Reading occasionally:
- PVP Online: The 1st web comic I read. Very funny, the 1st 100 strips or so. The humor ends up felling recycled by the 20th time Brent get’s mauled by a Panda.
- 8-bit theater: 8-bit Final Fantasy goodness
- Evil Inc.: About a supervillain Corporation.
- Good Ship Chronicles: A reality show based on a spaceship. Very witty, detailed-oriented humour at it’s best!
Feel free to give your favorite comics in the comments and I’ll add them in this post.
Reader created comics:
- Cat’s Grace: by Cayzle, Overflowing with geeky D&D references and puns.
- Orcusville by Steveill the Weevill: Pits our favorite Demon lord of the undead with other wacky characters. I’m not sure I get the humour yet but maybe I will soon.
Reader Submitted Comics:
- AppleGeeks
- Megatokyo: The tortured writings of an excellent artist
- Schlock Mercenary
- Penny and Aggie
- Looking for Group
- Least I Could Do (same author as LFG)
- Real Life – The Online Comic
- ExtraLife: Scott Johnson’s Comics, Podcasts, Blog, Artwork, Humor and MORE!
- xkcd: A webcomic of romance, sarcasm, math, and language
- Orneryboy: by Michael Lalonde
- The Adventures of Dr. McNinja : Applied Rule of Cool! (read from the beginning)
Other D&D strips to enjoy:
