Critical Hits

The Journal of Gamer Culture

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Powered by dark science and dark magic alike, he is nonetheless afraid of spoons. Josh covers tech news and over the top rants.

X-Men 3 Trailer

I’m sure just about everyone has seen it, but in case you haven’t, you can find it here. It looks pretty interesting, actually. I was surprised that they seemed to get everyone back for their principle characters.

Is Your IP Bad Enough to Rescue the President?

Here’s one for the kiddies… how awesome is YOUR IP address ? The site rates your IP number in various ways (including a poker hand!) and gives you a score at the end based on it. Sadly, my IP is only worth 23 points.

Here’s my poker hand:
Ace of ? Diamonds
Ace of ? Clubs
Jack of ? Spades
Six of ? Clubs
Two of ? Clubs

Sadly, only a pair.

Best Blonde Joke Evar!!

Oh, man, seriously! This is just absolutely hysterically funny. You have got to read this Blonde Joke!

It might take a while to get.

Windows Vista Overcooked

I just read an interesting article about Windows Vista and why it’s ultimately doomed to failure. For those who don’t know, Windows Vista is Microsoft’s new GUI subsystem in Longhorn. Wheras most GUI systems in operation today utilize old 2D methods for composition and display, Vista will instead use the 3D hardware to shove things out to screen, making it very pretty. So far so good; after all, we have this hardware available, why not use it, right?

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Mindstorms Requiem

I discovered an interesting analysis of why Lego was pulling back on its Mindstorms line. For those who don’t know, the Mindstorms line is a neat set of tools designed with the idea to create real working programmable robotics systems using Legos. The sets have proven wildly popular, but in recent years Lego has pulled most of the sets and all of the funding for them. This article goes into why.

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Find Your Secret Elvish and Hobbit Names

Something I discovered recently was a website that will generate your secret hobbit and elf name.

My secret Elven Name: Elwë Tulcakelumë
My secret Hobbit Name: Polo Danderfluff

Move Your Dead Bones

It has come to my attention that some people still haven’t seen the One Thing that the Internet Was Destined To Spread. For those of you who haven’t yet seen it, here it is: The music video to the third Reanimator movie, starring Jeffery Combs (who also voices the Question on JLU).

Move Your Dead Bones

Enjoy! But beware… it’s astonishingly addictive!

– Josh, Reanimating his feet

(Link fixed, thank you Google Video! –Ed)

Death of SWG

I’ve tried many MMORPGs in my time (ranging from the original Everquest to World of Warcraft) and while most have been amusing for a few hours, none had been able to keep my interest for very long.

The game that kept my interest for the longest was Star War Galaxies. The reason? Because they did something different. It wasn’t just a constant grinding hack-and-slash which grows exceedingly dull for me pretty quickly. It had other stuff to do, from making junk to just exploring and finding neat little bits nestled in the crannies of the world. More to the point, I felt like my actions had a small but perceptable effect on the game world, unlike with every other MMORPG which nothing you do seems to change the outcome of the world in any way, however small.

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No Gaming. Skip This Article

This article has no flowery language, no bile to spew, not even the smallest attempt to reconcile it with gaming. But I think it should be publicized anyway, in whatever way possible, simply for the sheer magnitude of vileness.

If anyone ever needed any evidence pointing to the inherent evil present in all humanity, that all of humanity is complete and total scum, this provides it.

More Sony Shennanigans

Oh, the fun just doesn’t stop with the Sony Corporation these days! An update on the Sony rootkit copy protection, regarding the offical uninstall proceedure as provided by Sony as told by the guy who was the originial discoverer of this wonderful corporate ‘fuck you!’:

“Without exaggeration I can say that I’ve analyzed virulent forms of spyware/adware that provide more straightforward means of uninstall.”

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